Hey everyone,
In this blog post I thought I would write about a short film that features Mel B & Sam Mackay, that was directed by Fabio D'Andrea which raises awareness of sexual or physical violence, and tries to portray a relatable story throughout the 4 minute piece. In the video, you can see that Mel is taking on the character of a female who is stuck in a toxic relationship, with Sam taking on the character of an abusive partner, control freak who is seen asking Mel why she has chosen a specific dress to wear, forcing her to wear something else and physically abusing and hurting her which only happens behind closed doors, with smiles and laughter when they are around other people.
If you or anybody you know if suffering physically, mentally, socially, sexually or verbally...please speak out and let somebody know. The worst kind of thing to do in this situation is stay quiet. The last year has been especially tough for those that are stuck in these kind of relationships, but there is help and support out there and you can get out of the difficult situations you are in.
(1) - Reach out. If you don't speak up, people won't know that you're struggling. Even if you go for a short walk around the park, or telling your toxic partner that you're going for a walk. Don't wear makeup and put on rotten clothes, otherwise they might think you're off to meet somebody or get help. This allows you to get some freedom and ask for help, or let somebody in your local area know that you're struggling.
(2) - Post online. The more awareness that be brought to this issue online, the easier it is for communities and individuals to step in and assist safely and securely, whilst also trapping those who are making life difficult for their partners.
(3) - Get a camera, phone or secret webcam. If you're able to film or voice record some of the arguments, situations or verbal communication between you and your partner, people will believe that you are dealing with a serious issue. A lot of people don't believe victims of abuse which is absolutely horrific, because why would somebody lie about being hurt or attacked? And if they do, then that's their problem, and when they really need help...they won't receive it. If you are truly suffering, having any form of recording or video can be shown as evidence in court, especially if you're able to see the individual on camera or can hear their voice clearly.
(4) - Know that you're not alone. According to Fabio's video which can be watched here states that '1 in 3 women globally, around 736 million, are subjected to physical or sexual violence', so although it may not help you with getting out of your current sitiation, I would recommend joining online support groups with other women who are going through similar struggles and try to give and get advice from others in a safe and secure environment.
(5) - Use the men around you as support. If you have an ex partner, male friends or know of people in the police force that you can trust, ask these men to help with your situation, the best thing to do is open up to them, explain that you're in a difficult situation and see what they can do to resolve the situation. You could give them the address you're currently at, give them the number of your abuser so that it can distract them for enough time, allowing you to pack a small bag of important and valuable items before leaving the area as quickly as possible. One of the things that I have learnt over the years is that 'stuff' can be replaced, but we only have 1 life, so that's more important than anything you own.
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